I was in love

(continuation from last Sunday)

During the whole walk to the new church's land, I avoided looking at him. I pretended he didn't exist but inside, I wasn't focusing on anything else but him. I don't remember whom I spoke to or what I did after seeing him the first time... all I know is that this white rabbit look-alike, totally fish-out-of-the-water girl was in love for the first time.

I went home feeling really down though. How could I feel attracted to an engaged pastor? That's absurd! I begged God to forgive me but the more I prayed, the more I thought of him until his face started to fade away from my memory. I asked my friend, who worked in the church's office, to give me a copy of his picture so I could pray over, which she gladly did.

I hardly saw him again after that day. He was later transferred to the church where my maid used to attend. I started asking her about him so often, she quickly concluded how I felt about him. So we both decided to unite our faith, pray, and fast for three Sundays. God would show me His will.

Meanwhile, I was raised as an assistant. It was so exciting to be able to assist people in the church... but I wasn't like the other assistants. I could only assist on Wednesdays and Fridays and I couldn't go to the slums to evangelize... it didn't take me too long to feel really inferior to the other assistants in the church. I wanted to do more but I couldn't, I wasn't allowed... I was different.